I worked full time for many years and just the process of getting out the house in the morning was nearly a full day’s work. Having two children they were at one point at different schools, at different parts of the town with different starting times with my office is a completely different part of town. Then there was the after school logistics to work around to. If all that wasn’t enough to think about there were school holidays and sudden sick days too. Once home in the evening there was less than 2 hours to get tea (if I had managed a food shop at some point) help with homework and spend time with the children before they went to bed. Needless to say I was permanently chasing my own tail and worn out.

Two years ago I decided to get some part of my life back and ventured into going self employed. The change in my and the children’s lives is huge. My commute to work is the arduous task of walking down the stairs. I finish my day when the children come home from school. I have enough energy left that if work needs doing I can when they have gone to bed. The children look forward to school holidays instead of dreading the farming out to various clubs.

I’m not saying it’s the easy option. Going self employed as a single mum is a challenge. Money is tighter but when I asked the children what they thought if I went self employed and the fact there would be less money, they were both more than enthusiastic. They knew it would make me a happier mum which made them happier.

You may now be slightly intrigued if you could be self employed. It doesn’t suit every one; you have to be self motivated and disciplined. If you’re a bit flaky on either of these then you may not be able to keep yourself away from the daytime TV when you should be working. It’s not an easy opt out solution.

If your still interested the next question is probably what self employed job could you do. Antonia Chitty has some excellent advice in her book Family Friendly Working, have a think about your skills. Write them down if possible.

• Can you cook, sew or take a good photo?
• Can you type, do shorthand or have other secretarial skills?
• Do you love to iron or getting to grips with a yucky oven?
• Do you have green fingers?

The list can be huge. Maybe you have hobby which could be turned into a business.

If you’re serious about making the jump I really recommend Antonia Chittys books. She talks you through different ways of setting it up, financing your idea and lots more. Two books I can really recommend are:

		Family Friendly Working – this has loads of ideas but also all the practical things you need to know beforehand. It talks you through the different ways to go into business, how to set it up and how to grow your business.
	Buy Now
		Start A Family Friendly Business: 129 Brilliant Business Ideas for Mums – if you’re stuck on what to do.
	Buy Now

Also have a read through a couple of websites that really helped me were:

Advice Guide

Small business

Business Link

Talk to the Lone Parent Advisor at your local job centre. They will talk through the financial scenarios as well as other help they can give like small courses on going self employed ( for managing your books etc). Once I knew some figures of what I could be earning I also checked the different scenarios out on the Benefit Checker at Turn2Us.

My biggest advice is to way everything up, make sure you have thought the cost side out really thoroughly. Talk with your children if they are old enough to understand,let them think on the idea and then see how they feel. Going self employed was the best thing I ever did as well as the most challenging.

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So you trawled you way through the dating sites, been on the blind dates set up by well intended friends and spent a lot of time in the supermarkets, libraries and art galleries and finally found a man. He has even passed the small milestone of being compatible. Now is the time you get to see if he is actually into you as much as you are into him. Yes I know your gorgeous, lovely and an absolute delight to be around but is it a case of ‘he’s just not that into you’? I have just read the brilliant book of the same title. They call it the no-excuses truth to understanding men and with its no nonsense, tell it as it is approach it really was like a breath of fresh air. You might even recognise the line from Sex and the City but that will be because one of the authors was a writer and a consultant from the series.

• If he’s not asking you out
• If he’s not calling you
• If he doesn’t want to marry you

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