Confessions of a Single Mum

Archive for the ‘Single Mum Ramblings’ Category

As I lay in bed the other night listening to the kids snoring – would be kind of sweet if it wasn’t through two closed doors, I was thinking about my kids and their bedrooms. I know when they are young it is down to us as parents to make sure their bedrooms are clean, tidy and don’t house potential health and safety issues but at what age should we hand over the responsibility to them. I guess the quick answer is when they are capable of doing it all themselves and this varies from child to child. I know when I was a kid my tidy bedroom or lack of tidiness was the start of many an argument with my parents. I begrudged tidying it as it was my room, it was supposed to be my space and my haven from the adults. It was a place I had my own identity. I of course never let on to my parents they were right and it was a nicer place tidy. So now I am thinking who is it I actually want my kid’s bedroom tidy for? Is it for me and my sense of duty, visitors and family or any passing burglar? If I dictate their rooms have to be tidy will it cause problems in further life? Will I have two Goths on my hands as they feel it’s the only way they can express themselves. I guess part of it all is getting them in training for later life. But as adults they are  going to have a life full of cleaning and tidying so couldn’t I just let them enjoy mess now or am I just talking my way out of doing what’s got to be done and just ride the arguments.

Manners – why doesn’t the younger generation possess them anymore? I can’t honestly be the only one who thinks like this or maybe I am.

 When I was young it was installed into me on a daily bases that manners don’t cost anything but are priceless when used. It’s not just the please and thank yous in the right places but the courteous things too. Now it might be me just getting old and turning into my mother, but it is really starting to rial me. When children are very young we diligently taught them to say please and thank you and then looked on all proud when they manage to mutter it at the appropriate times to other people. But recent trips into town first made me angry and then stop and question if I have actually taught my children enough manners. Read the rest of this entry »

There are moments in my single mum life I could wish myself away to another planet. You may be familiar with this feeling too. Like when the children don’t get on and I have to have more peace talks than the United Nations or when I not only singe tea but actually manage to cremate the last viable meal in the cupboards and we have to eat it. I sit there and wonder if I could feel any more of a failure. But then there are the moments that make your heart melt and your head dizzy with happiness. These moments may be brief and quick in passing but they make it all worthwhile. Read the rest of this entry »

I don’t very often use the single mum card nor do I get wound up easily but last week I reached the end of my tether.

If your reading this form outside the UK let quickly explain our system here. Basically all your working life just under a third of your wages is taken from your wage packet before it is even paid to you. It’s paid direct to the government for them to do with as they want. It’s apparently to pay for all the services we have. Read the rest of this entry »

I think the hardest part of being a single mum for me is Christmas. I can cope with most things that are thrown at me throughout the year and I am getting a dab hand at DIY. But Christmas is different. Read the rest of this entry »

On perusing my children’s Christmas present list today, it has struck me how things have changed. I could now harp on about when I was young I was lucky to get an orange in my stocking or how the size of the actual orange was a good indication of how good the present was going to be or not to be as more often the case. But I think my children would die of shock if they thought an orange and one present was all they going to get Read the rest of this entry »

One of the main things about Christmas is the sense of magic that the children have. Their little faces lit up with the sheer excitement and belief that a 6ft fat bloke in a red suit does actually deliver their presents. It is also a god send to harassed parents as the old cliché line of being good for Santa can be recited when needed in the build up to the season. Read the rest of this entry »

Believe in yourself and magic will happen – I think this can sum up the highs and lows of being a single mum. When you first start out its daunting to think you will be doing it all yourself. Then as time goes along you sudden realises it’s been weeks or months or in my case years and your still surviving. Sometimes though, doubt can creep into your mind. Are you doing the right thing, are you too strict or not strict enough. Read the rest of this entry »