Watching good old Eastenders the other night, Jane mentioned mid life crises and being 40. Quick on the up take my son asks me my age. He knows this but needs me to say it out loud. Yes I am 40. So then he asks me what is a mid life crisis and have I got one. After I stifle the fit of giggles I explain the best I can what a mid life crises is and no I don’t have one.

He seems happy with this till he goes to bed. He has obviously been worrying about the discussion and tells me I really should think about having a mid life crisis if Jane is thinking of having one on Eastenders.

So I think I am planning my own mid life crisis. I want to decide my own fate before a mid life crisis creeps up on me.

Men typically buy a sports car or a motorbike. Hmm both are impractical for me (hang on isn’t that what it’s all about?) and I am far too sensible to go for impractical.

Sky diving seems pretty standard to for a mid life crisis but I start to wobble at the top of my stairs so a plane is really out of the question.

Next to spring to mind are adding or removing bodily bits i.e. boob job or liposuction? No mine are big enough and ew lipo no way.

Dying hair an odd and vibrant colour and/or cutting it all off? It has taken me 40 years to discover my perfect hair cut so no I am not about to spend another 40 putting it right again.

Dress totally inappropriately for my age. Well technically I do already. Don’t hate me but I can still fit into kids jeans (they are so much cheaper).

Have a divorce and start all over again? Oh I have so been there and worn out the t-shirt.

This is harder than I thought, oh wait I have got an idea. Drum roll please……

My midlife crisis is going to be not having one. I shall just be practical and safe me as boring is the new exciting.