Before having children having a social life was easy. Well once you’ve made the effort to get ready and get your self out there it was. If someone text you last minute lets go out for a drink there wasn’t much you would have to check before replying yes count me in. If you suddenly felt the need to go for a walk around the block after that second helping of chocolate cake, no problem. Wanted to pop over to friends? Again no problem.
Then you have children. At first, when they are little, you don’t want to leave them and almost laugh at your former life where staying in was counted as boring. You and your other half coo lovingly over the sleeping darlings whilst saying going out is so over rated. You no longer feel the need to have adult conversations as that small little bundle is all you live for and want to talk about. This slowly changes when first tooth tears appear and then they start getting strong willed and your need for adult conversation starts to return. You and your other half take it in turns to go out or you get a babysitter.
Then, somehow with what ever your circumstances that got you there, your a single parent. To start you can’t imagine ever going out as it seems so scary an your so tired but eventually you will get to the point that you are climbing the walls. You want, no scrub that , you need to get out.
But logistics of babysitters, cost of it all and actually finding the energy to get out the door can be all too much. But how else can you have a social life let alone enjoy yourself in the adult world?
Well you could always host nights in. They don’t have to be extravagant but invite people to you. Dinner parties or pizza and a bottle. Whichever its getting people to talk to.
If friends are few and far between or divided after the divorce you will have the slow process of making new friends. Don’t despair though as you have the whole world of internet interaction to help you. No I am not sending you off to dating sites already but things like online bingo. No longer for Grannies in cardigans its now online and the biggest thing about it is the social chatter that happens. As you play bingo there is chat box that everyone can chat away in. Friendships form and a big community spirit can be found.
Why not see if you can team up with other single parents. They often arrange group activities that you and your children can do with others in the same circumstances. Local health centers may have details or even check it out online.
Lastly don’t get despondent. Try and build a good support group around you with family and friends and when any of them offer help accept it. They are offering as they want to .