It will be fun they said.
I am not an online dating newbie by any stretch of the imagination. Many many years ago I, and a few other partners in crime were active on the online dating scene. We had it all down to a fine art. We would look after each other’s backs after a thorough vetting session over several bottles of wine. We were each other’s safeties as we had to text so many hours into just double check we hadn’t been murdered. Even rescue disaster dates if needed.
Between us, we discovered several jerks, full-blown love a few times and had a lot of laughs as well as drinks, coffees, meals out and hotels. Shock! Get over it we are all adults.
So as I find myself merrily single again it was suggested to try it again. So rather nervously I looked into it. I didn’t use my picture to create my profile as something told me to be cautious. Yes, I know online dating but it surely must have changed a bit in 13 years. Once I had filled enough of my profile out to let me peruse the new fresh dating market I had a search. Entered postcode, male and few other details and was given a rogues gallery to view.
Oh good grief what fresh hell is this. My last search all those years ago was for men in their 30’s and it was a bit like a kid in a sweet shop with all the lovely eye candy. Fast forward to now and I can safely say I have never noticed before how badly men age. I mean it’s not a pretty sight. Yes, I know we, including me of course, are all a lot older but really? My heart sank with disappointment.
But that’s not where the hell ended. Oh no. As I scrolled I recognized people. Then I recognized more. Most were customers, as in they come into the shop where I work daily. And I am not talking about the pick of the candy bunch here either. I can’t even imagine the horror of serving in the shop and some bright spark grinning at me with their toothless smile and wonky eye giving me that look. And I am not even going to think about the ones who come into the shop with their wives!
I very quickly deleted my profile and now considering plan B.